5 things a mother would never say

1. "How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back?"

2. "Let me smell that shirt -- Yeah, it's good for another week"

3. "Well, if Johnny’s mum says it's OK, that's good enough for me."

4. "I don't have a tissue with me ... just use your sleeve"

5. "Don't bother wearing a jacket - the wind-chill is bound to improve"